17 August, 2009

and I'm saying good byes again.

Its been two years now. Two years with Google. I never thought I would fall in love with this place or make any worthy friends here or even have fun. Chennai was just too good for me, I wasn't willing to let any more people flood my life and leave again. But somehow over the first year, I made one good friend, in another two months I made a few more, and then I think I just became myself and let many people into my life and became a part of theirs.

Now on a rainy August evening I sit and look at the countdown of Mamsy's mirror - the countdown for her to return from the US. I sit and look at the untouched Calvin & Hobbes that Appy gave me to read and told me to take all the world's time with - till yesterday she said - '2 months, and I'll be gone.' I sit and read through Hari's blog and think about how the invisible man pinged me all of a sudden and gave me the news that he is leaving in a week's time. I sit and think about how Roosho and Varun *tarun* have not been in the breakout area for 2 days now to smile at. I sit and look through pictures on FB and think how Upsi's in Goa with her friends and not at her desk for me to bug. I sit and think about how Arun moved to another team and how he is never online during the day to ping and bug. I sit and think about how Naveen is back in India and yet so far away. I sit and think about how I let this happen to me yet again - how I let people come into my life and go with the various boarding schools and hostels. How I let them become a part of my life when I know it will be painful again to say goodbye. I sit and think about how in a few months, I might be packing to say bye to the Hyderabadi life I promised I would never fall in love with. I sit and think about how I cribbed over the missing Hyd monsoons and how today they arrived to make me smile. I sit and think about the various house hunting & moving - and how each left me a memory. I sit and think about how the next move will be for good and will be for home.

Most of all, I sit and think about how my most cherished Chennai love is missing for a long time. How the best of friends have found their way with life and left behind memories. How my throat aches when I browse through pictures or look at my wall at home. How some things like "I promise to keep in touch" are just things we say. How sometimes you make all the effort for nothing. And how now ppl call with something in mind and some other thing in return.

If people are a part of your life, why can't you take them with you? If you are a part of their life, why do they have to be so far away? If distance makes relationships stronger - why not try and keep in touch.

I'm gonna miss you guys so much - I'm a Hyderabadi Jay. True. Once a Hyderabadi, always a Hyderabadi. I'm gonna miss everything about this place.

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