05 July, 2017

Maid of Honor - Break Period

If you've read the topic and imagined a beautiful wedding in a church with similarly dressed bridesmaids, snap out of it!

Maid of Honour - Pun intended.

Last week I received a message from a friend. It said that her long term servant maid who had nannied her two children for over 14 years had passed away and she mentioned that this lovely lady just visited her a week back to see the children. The message mentioned the inconsolable children and the heartbroken family.

My Himalayan Baahubalian level craftily talented friend always shared pictures of her kids when they went for a costume party, birthdays, Christmas, Easter, weddings, Onam etc. I had always noted this little woman would be around somewhere or her mention would always be there. For Onam, she has helped my friend's daughter to decorate the poo kolams and a very happily proud mother would share pictures with us. A rainbow themed birthday and the mother would share a picture of her daughter and maid to show us the decorations they had done. Every time I received a message, I would hurry to open it because no matter what, her messages always made me happy.

The message was heartbreaking - yes. More than heartbreaking, I was moved by how my friend had is chosen to eulogize the memory of her accepted family member so beautifully and share it with all of her friends. Family is who we choose beyond the biological connect. Family is what we make it.

In memory of Rengamma. A woman I didn't know. A woman I had never met. A woman who just made things better for the family she was in. 

02 July, 2017

Being there - Break Period

With a whirlwind of occasions and family situations, i hadn't been in touch with my writing. I've just hit the pillow and thought what the past two weeks have been like. 

The back to school routine is on and early mornings are the enemy now. Somehow Mondays and Wednesdays and happy happy cause of the super silambam classes I'm doing. It's been four classes now and I'm hooked. 

The past one week has been a roller coaster one. My maternal grandfather had been in and out of the hospital. It came as a sudden emergency all of a sudden and at that moment I didn't really know what I was doing. G man was in school, mum was in the hospital with her dad and my other set of grandparents needed babysitting. With a whoosh I picked G from school and in a few hours I was in the hospital with my brother in a city 53 kilometres away. 

Grandpa is better now. Big sigh of relief but then I had been thinking how unprepared I was at a time of emergency. Well, it is an emergency, yes. What we prioritise during these times is so important. The whole situation turned out to be a difficult one since most family members were travelling. Dad in the US and my husband in France. All my brother and I had in mind was to be there to support mum. Somehow to me I just felt it wasn't enough. We were there, we did whatever we had to. We never feel adequate when we have to be there for our parents. Somewhere there is a hole and it just isn't enough. 

Being around one another and being there is the most important thing, in whatever way you can - this was the conclusion at Break Period.  

The ladies had nothing else to say. We do what we do for our parents but it's never going to be how our parents did it for us. 

I'm just dozing now thinking - I hope I'm doing enough for my little boy. 

Lesson from the weeks gone by. 

Love, matters. Love matters. Be there - in person, over the phone, video or anything. But just be there with a voice and face - time is fleeting and some moments are the one that make a mark for a lifetime. 

Back to the grind

With the start of the academic year here, life is almost back to the grind. School is priority uno for both G boy and me. This year looks pr...